WellBeing Ed

How to Approach the Unspoken: Talking to Kids About Mental Health with Confidence
Mar 2
7 min read
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Navigating conversations about mental health with children can be challenging, but it is also incredibly important. Many adults hesitate to bring up this topic, fearing they might say the wrong thing or unintentionally upset a young mind. However, having these discussions can help children develop critical skills for understanding their feelings and seeking help when necessary. When we create an open and supportive environment, we can reduce the stigma surrounding mental health and empower children to express themselves freely.
In this article, we will outline effective strategies for discussing mental health with your children. With practical tips and insights, you can gain the confidence to engage in these vital conversations.
Understanding Mental Health
To talk about mental health with children, it's important to first understand what mental health means and why it matters. Mental health includes our feelings, thoughts, and how we relate to others. It affects how we handle daily life, manage stress, build relationships, and make choices. Good mental health helps children deal with challenges and succeed at home, school, and in other areas of life.
Knowing about mental health is especially important because, according to the World Health Organization, 1 in 6 children aged 6-17 has a mental health disorder each year. This shows how common mental health issues are among kids and highlights the need for open talks about mental health. By discussing feelings and mental well-being with children, we can help reduce the stigma around these topics and create a safe space for them to share.
It’s also important to understand that mental health is not just about not having a mental illness. It’s about being in a good state of well-being that needs regular care. Just like we take care of our physical health with exercise and good food, we should also focus on mental health through supportive conversations, education, and resources. This proactive approach helps children better understand their feelings, notice when they are struggling, and ask for help when they need it.
By creating an environment that values mental health awareness, we give children the tools to handle their own mental health issues and develop empathy for others who may be facing challenges. These conversations are crucial for building a healthier and more supportive society where mental health is seen as an important part of overall well-being.
Why Discuss Mental Health with Kids
Discussing mental health with children is important for three reasons:
Normalizes Conversations: Kids who learn about mental health are more likely to discuss their feelings openly and honestly. This open dialogue is crucial because it fosters an environment where children feel safe to express their emotions without fear of judgment.
A comprehensive study conducted by the American Psychological Association found that when mental health topics are openly discussed at home, children report significantly lower levels of anxiety and depression. This normalization of conversation not only helps children articulate their own feelings but also equips them with the vocabulary and understanding necessary to navigate complex emotional landscapes as they grow.
Furthermore, by integrating discussions about mental health into everyday conversations, parents and caregivers can model healthy emotional expression, demonstrating that it is not only acceptable but also beneficial to talk about one’s feelings and mental well-being.
Builds Empathy: When children understand mental health, they can better empathize with peers who are facing various challenges, whether those challenges are related to mental health issues or other personal struggles. By educating children about different mental health conditions and the feelings associated with them, they become more aware of the diverse experiences of their peers.
A survey conducted by the National Association of School Psychologists indicates that empathetic children are more likely to establish supportive friendships and engage in positive social interactions. This development of empathy not only enhances their social skills but also promotes a culture of kindness and understanding within their peer groups.
As children learn to recognize and validate the feelings of others, they become advocates for mental health awareness, contributing to a more compassionate community.
Encourages Help-Seeking Behaviour: Children who learn that talking about feelings is acceptable and encouraged are more likely to seek help from caring adults or mental health professionals when they encounter difficulties. This proactive approach to mental health is essential, as research shows that early intervention can significantly improve outcomes for children dealing with mental health issues.
By fostering an environment where seeking help is normalized, children are empowered to take charge of their mental health. They learn that it is a sign of strength to ask for help rather than a sign of weakness. Moreover, this openness can lead to early identification of potential mental health issues, allowing for timely support and resources that can make a substantial difference in a child's life. Ultimately, instilling these values in children promotes resilience and equips them with the tools they need to navigate life’s challenges effectively.
Signs That Kids Need to Talk
Recognizing the signs that children may need to discuss their mental health is crucial. Some indicators include:
Sudden changes in behavior or mood
Withdrawal from friends or activities they once enjoyed
Frequent complaints of physical symptoms, such as stomachaches or headaches, with no clear cause
Difficulty concentrating or focusing on tasks
Increased irritability or anger
Changes in sleep or appetite
By monitoring these signs, you can more effectively initiate conversations about mental health.
Creating a Safe Space for Conversation
Choosing the Right Time and Place
The timing and environment matter when starting a conversation about mental health. Opt for a calm setting where your child feels comfortable—this could be during a car ride, while cooking, or sitting together in the living room. Avoid initiating such conversations during high-stress moments or when they may be distracted.
Be Present and Engaged
To foster open dialogue, be genuinely present. Set aside distractions like phones and TVs, focusing your attention solely on your child. This shows that you value their thoughts and feelings, promoting trust.
Use Age-Appropriate Language
Tailor your language to your child's age and understanding. For younger children, simple definitions or relatable visuals work best. For older kids and teens, you can engage in more complex discussions. For instance, instead of defining anxiety in abstract terms, you could share a relatable story about a time you felt anxious before a big presentation.

Starting the Conversation
Use Open-Ended Questions
Use open-ended questions to encourage your child to share their thoughts. Instead of asking, "Are you sad?", try, "What has been on your mind lately?" This prompts a more comprehensive discussion and allows them to express themselves freely.
Share Your Experiences
Modelling vulnerability can be powerful. Share your own experiences and feelings related to mental health. This normalizes the topic and reassures children they are not alone in their struggles. Research by the Children's Mental Health Network shows that kids who hear about their parents' challenges are more likely to open up.
Utilize Books and Media
Books and movies can serve as great conversation starters about mental health. Look for stories that address emotional challenges, such as anxiety or depression, which resonate with children’s experiences. For example, the book "The Huge Bag of Worries" explores anxiety in a child-friendly way, making it easier to discuss similar feelings.
Addressing Concerns and Misconceptions
Validate Their Feelings
It's important to let your child know that it’s natural to feel a range of emotions. Validating their feelings is essential. For instance, you might say, "It’s okay to feel anxious before an important exam," reinforcing their emotions as normal and understandable.
Debunking Myths
Children often pick up misconceptions about mental health from their peers or media. Take the time to correct these misunderstandings by explaining that mental health doesn't mean being "crazy" and that everyone has mental health, just like physical health. Studies show that breaking down these myths can foster better understanding and acceptance.
Discussing Treatment Options
Discuss the various treatment options available for mental health issues, such as therapy, medication, or family and friend support. Understanding that help is accessible, and effective can empower children. According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, early treatment improves outcomes for 70-90% of children diagnosed with mental health conditions.
Encouraging Ongoing Conversations
Make Mental Health a Regular Topic
Integrate discussions about mental health into daily life. By doing so, you normalize the topic and encourage children to share their feelings regularly. For example, you could mention how you coped with stress after a challenging week.
Teach Coping Strategies

Help children learn and practice coping strategies for when they feel overwhelmed. Simple activities like breathing exercises, journaling, or drawing can provide them with valuable tools. Encourage them to find and share what strategies resonate with them.
Emphasize Emotional Literacy
Emotional literacy is the ability to recognize and express feelings. Teach your children to identify various emotions and what they mean. Tools like "feelings wheels" can help younger children articulate their emotions, making it easier for them to express what they are experiencing.
Involving Other Support Systems
Encourage Peer Conversations
Promote discussions about mental health among your child's friends. This builds a supportive environment and helps them realize they are not alone. Group activities, such as emotional check-ins during school or at home, can normalize these conversations.
Partner with Educators
Establish open communication with your child's teachers and school counsellors. Schools are increasingly acknowledging the importance of mental health. A supportive educational setting contributes significantly to your child's overall well-being.
Seek Professional Help if Needed
If you observe persistent signs of distress or your child expresses feelings of sadness or hopelessness, reaching out to a mental health professional is essential. Seeking help demonstrates strength and can significantly impact your child's journey.
Building Resilience in Children
Promote Problem-Solving Skills
Teach children how to tackle challenges to build resilience. Encourage brainstorming solutions when faced with obstacles, reinforcing that challenges can be overcome. This practical skill can greatly assist them in everyday life.
Foster a Growth Mindset
Help children develop a growth mindset, allowing them to view setbacks as chances for learning, rather than failures. Reinforce the importance of perseverance by celebrating the effort they put into overcoming difficulties.

Celebrate Achievements
Recognizing and celebrating both small and big accomplishments can boost children’s self-esteem. Acknowledgment encourages them to keep expressing their feelings. Studies show that positive reinforcement contributes significantly to developing confidence.
Taking Action Together
Talking to children about mental health might seem intimidating, but its impact on their emotional well-being is profound. By creating a supportive environment, using appropriate language, and emphasizing emotional literacy and resilience, you can instill confidence in children.
Equipping them with the knowledge and tools to understand their emotions empowers them to advocate for their own mental health throughout their lives. By taking these essential steps, we contribute to a culture of openness and understanding, transforming the narrative around mental health for future generations.
Engaging in these conversations is not just about talking; it’s about actively listening and nurturing a relationship that promotes mental well-being. With each discussion, you help build skills for today and lay the foundation for healthy emotional health in the future.
Let’s make sure these conversations are heard.